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"The Truth is Out There"-
      -Scully in 'The X-Files'

"It's Not There, I looked..."
                   -Khatarnak Chokra in his Memoirs

The story begins a few hundred light years away from Earth, on the planet of Zokachanhu in the Andromeda Galaxy. Zokachanhu was mainly inhabited by the Dubasu species. The Emperor of this planet was a tyrant named HuiHui. Now, HuiHui and his wife ChuiMui had a child called Chho-Cute. Chho-Cute (as his name suggests) was a cute little Dubasling who, under normal circumstances, might have spend his childhood happily playing Guillotine-Danda with other Dubaslings of his age. But if it had been so, this story would not have proceeded.

So, as Fate had ordained, one fine morning {space date &¥×Þß«±¶} HuiHui decided that he wasn't happy being the Emperor of Zokachanhu alone. He was getting ambitious. He wanted to invade the neighboring planet of Posiquebex which was ruled by Emperor Po. The seeds of this ambition were sown in his mind by his devious wife ChuiMui (hey, where would a story be without a cunning, devious female, huh? You got any better ideas? If no, then let me proceed with the tale...) Now, ChuiMui was NOT a very beautiful female Dubasling. So she had always planned on getting a secret beauty treatment called Cindrellointin available only at the planet of Posiquebex. This beauty treatment was zealously guarded by the Posiquebexians and was only available to their royal family. So, ChuiMui thought that if she could get her husband to go to war with Posiquebex by luring him with another planet under his fiefdom, she could attain her objective of gaining access to Cindrellointin. (Yeah, I know the plot's a bit weak, but hey, I never claimed that Dubasling females could think straight, did I?) 

Okay, Okay, I hear you say impatiently, but whatever happened to that Dubasling prince Chho-Cute and for heavens sake, where does Khatarnak Chokra fit in all this?? Patience, my friend, patience. After all, I am making this up as I go along, I'll figure out something, don't worry... 

Well, the war between Zokachanhu and Posiquebex empires lasted for about 13 solono-galacteons (which is about 90 earth days since one solono-galacteon = 6.92307692 Earthdays....not that you would care....) The Posiquebexians, though low on advanced weaponry, were high on common sense. So they used a genetic weakness of the Dubasians to defeat them. The Posiquebexians had stored vast amounts of deadly 'Radioactive Fart Vapoursin their gas chambers and used this arsenal against the Dubasian army. It was chemical warfare at it's deadliest. It is a well-documented intergalactic fact that Dubasians are highly allergic to fart vapour (and radioactive at that! ) due to a gentic imbalance and the Posiquebexians used this knowledge to their full advantage. You see, the smart Posiquebexians had forseen this war and had started storing this fart vapour in their gas storage chambers for many-an-eon. In the immortal words of the late eminent Posiquebexian scientist Jikadon: 

"Fart vapour is a critical and non-renewable natural resource and must be preserved at all costs. So whenever you feel one rushing through you system eager to blow out, run to the nearest government-sponsored fart storage chamber and get it deposited for future use. You will do your Empire an invaluable service.Remember, ask not what your Empire can do for you but what your fart can do for your Empire".

Anyway, in the end the defeated Emperor of Zokachanhu, His Royal Highness poor Mister HuiHui and Mrs. ChuiMui were taken prisoners and bound in chains by Emperor Po. However, unknown to the Posiquebexians, just before they had raided the royal palace, the prince Chho-Cute had been despatched in a space ship by his parents to escape arrest. (Oh Yeah?, queries some smart-ass, so why didn't his parents escape with him? Oh man, I retort exasperatedly, how do I know....maybe the spaceship was a one-seater...hey, do you want to hear the story or what?...) 

Okay, I suppose now you can guess what must have happened, the spaceshiparrived a few hundred light years away in our own Milky Way galaxyand crashed on a blue planet known to us as Earth (documented as 'Pizzakhaomain' in the intergalactic-time-space-dimensional map) in a country called India. To cut a long story short, it was the owner of this very website who discovered our little hero Chho-Cute and saved his life and in return the little prince vowed to act as the Siteowners' little genie, and took upon the task already mentioned on the main page

Now, what else am I forgetting??? Oh yes, the name change. Well, you see, the little one could not be going around on Earth being called Chho-Cute. There were two reasons for that. Firstly, it was a serious health hazard. Why, you ask? Because, with a name like Chho-Cute, everywhere he went people would have pulled his cheeks and Dubasling kids have very sensitive cheeks, you know. That would have killed the poor chap. Secondly, he had to protect his identity from a group on Earth called as "Men In Black Briefs". They are a US- government sponsored group whose members roam around in black briefs searching for extra-terrestrial life on earth. Their job is to give a good spanking to all aliens as a welcoming gesture on Earth. This spanking too, would have been fatal. So with a heavy heart the Webmaster decided to anoint him with the title of 'Khatarnak Chokra'. (Ta-da!! Suspense over!) In Hindi language 'Khatarnak Chokra' means 'Dangerous Bloke'. This particular name so that people would get scared shitless of this kid and not dare to pull his cheeks and the Men In Black Briefs would think that he is just one of us. So you see, the name is only a defence mechanism. In real life, he's quite harmless, believe me; he's only bitten me thrice. 

As for the future plans of Khatarnak Chokra, well, he wants to go back one day to reclaim his kingdom from the Posiquebexians and free his parents. He tells me that he's building a brand new spaceship and plans to borrow some weaponry of us earthlings to defeat his enemy. What weapons, do you ask? Oh, he's of the opinion that the Posiquebexians would never be able to withstand his attacks if he beams some of Madonna's music videos over their communication networks and some of Metallica's tapes too....well, to each his own, I suppose.... 

So, does that tie up all the loose ends of the story? I guess it does. So are you going to be here all day? The story has ended man, Finito, The End. Go take a hike. Pee, fart, burp, scratch yer butt and then come back here and explore the entire site. Bye. Ciao. May the Force be with you. 

Site Concept, Design & Content Amit Rai
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